Why Read?

Lately, I have been reading a lot more. Usually, I am not a reader, but people have told me that reading will help increase my writing skills.  So I am now reading! I have made a commitment to read at least one book a month. My bookshelf is full of books because every time I go to Lifeway, I have to pick up a new one. Well, it’s time to dive in!

This month, I am reading “Jesus, the One and Only”. I absolutely love Beth Moore and the way she writes. I also think it helps because I have heard her speak and met her at The Passion Conference a few years ago. When she writes and speaks, she is completely sharing her heart and urges others to understand the Truth she is describing. It’s not about her agenda, but it’s all about the One she is writing for.

In this particular book, she reflects on the accounts of Jesus. I have had a relationship with Jesus for almost ten years now. Just like the other relationships in life, it deepens when you’re spending time with one another. Reading and learning about Scripture is a way to deepen that relationship. There are moments when I’m reading and I will think, “Oh, yeah! Why didn’t I see that before?” then hide it in my heart and thank Him.

I don’t know where you are in your relationship with Jesus. Or if you have one. Maybe you don’t even desire to know Him. All I can say is I love Him and I ask Him to touch your heart with these blogs! He is the Author of my life. These shaky Cerebral Palsy hands have been entrusted with sharing a great story. And so I am writing with humility and grace.

Reading is not just for head knowledge, but I ask you to allow it to transform your heart and ignite a passion!

Love Has Won

Many people start making New Year’s resolutions as soon as the clock strikes midnight! Although I had my list ready, (I am a list maker) I didn’t really set any in place. For some reason I felt like I needed to reflect. I feel like sometimes I forget that I should take time to praise Jesus for the blessings and learn from the lessons.

“STOP… LISTEN TO ME, I AM SPEAKING TO YOU, MY DAUGHTER,” said Jesus. I capitalize that not because he yelled at me out of anger.  But I believe He is excited for me to see the beauty He revealed in my life the past year from a different perspective.

I cannot explain everything that happened to me in 2014, but two things major happened that were life changing. I will never be the same.

I was selected to spend the summer in Washington D.C. I knew it was an awesome opportunity when I had the initial offer for the interview but when I received the placement for the Senate HELP Committee Disability Policy Office, I knew it was an once in a lifetime experience. Moving up to DC was eventful. There were times when it almost became too much. David and my parents were willing to do anything to make it happen! The summer was incredible. Working with Senator Harkin and his staff was an unforgettable experience! Although the work was tough, it was an honor. I made several friends throughout the summer. One in particular, Clem, became a dear friend. We learned so much together and he was the one I texted when deadlines become too overwhelming.  He understood the “Angela language.” You know, when I speak under my breath, hoping people won’t understand me. It was funny because it became my goal to make him laugh during the times we were supposed to be quiet. Oh, so many other great memories. The summer in Washington was life-changing!

I returned home in August ready for my last semester of graduate school. I started my fall internship a week after the move.  Everything was back to normal. Or so I thought.  I was working every day and didn’t do a lot of other things because of the hectic schedule. One day, David did not feel very well, so I asked my mom to come help me get ready for bed. To my surprise, daddy came with her. Not because he had to, but because he wanted to see me. We talked about work and he laughed because I wouldn’t let him change the thermostat. At the end of their visit, he hugged me and said, “I love you, babe” in his southern accent.

That Tuesday, September 7^th, I went to the office just as any other day. My van started to stutter a little. I thought I would just call daddy when I got to the office. But the morning turned out to be really busy and I planned to call when I got home. So I texted him and told him I’d call him later. When I got home, I called several times and he didn’t answer. I thought he probably just fell asleep and forgot the phone in another room. I asked David to go check on him. A small voice told me that I should stay home. When David arrived, daddy didn’t open the door. Mama rushed home and together, they found daddy had passed away in his bed. After a few minutes, David had told me over the phone because I knew something was terribly wrong and I was flipping out because mama would not tell me why she was crying.

On my way, the first person I called was Melody. She has been that friend that you may not see every day but is the one you call first when you need someone there. And she was there as I pulled up. There were also an ambulance, a fire truck, and police.  All I can remember was Melody and David pushing me to the house that I called home for over twenty-five years. But as I entered, I realized that a huge part of my heart was gone. You see after the month that I moved out, daddy and I became really close. The dynamic of our relationship changed. He was always there when we needed anything, but our relationship was now driven by a desire to know one another and love.

Maybe I will write about the following weeks in a different post. But for now, I need you to know that love has won! I love you, daddy!

In the closing of 2014, I just wanted to remember the incredible story God has written for me to roll through. 

New Start

I have been wanting to blog for many years, but I am never consistent! School and all sorts of excuses have been my reasons for not writing! I love writing but typing is rough, especially with only two fingers. You know when typing for school, it’s for a grade. Or work, it’s for a paycheck. But, a blog? What can that be for?  Over the last week, God has shown me examples of how blogs can touch millions of people just with one person typing out their heart.  I surely don’t expect a million followers, but if I can touch one person, then I’ve accomplished this calling.

So I asked myself, “Why don’t you ask your attendant to type as you talk?” I tried to search for excuses again! “Time, uhhh time, time?” I have a ton of free time now. So what is it? What is keeping me from recording my wonderful journey? PRIDE! I didn’t want to ask someone to help me write. I felt like if I asked them to type something that they don’t agree with, then I would have to give an explanation. I hate confrontation. But I realize I don’t have to explain!

I am God’s masterpiece. I must shine for Him!

Life is Precious

I really don’t like to write about controversial issues. I am a person who likes to make everyone like me, but my ultimate goal in life is to glorify God. I have recently been in many conversations about abortion. Now, before you shake your fist at me, I want you to know that I am a writer and I write what God lays on my heart, and that is between Jesus and me; I am just sharing.

Now, that we have that clear, I am going to come right out and say that I believe abortion is wrong and is a sin. I believe every child is a gift from God. Today, as I sat with my friends and their newborn, I realized how life is precious. The bump in her tummy that I rubbed a few days ago was now laying in front of me. Those tiny fingers and nose were created by them same God who created this entire world, no, the entire universe! It says in Psalm 139:13:

                For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb.

The term “fetus” that doctors use, is actually a life. The little one has a heartbeat and kicks the mommy when she eats something gross. To me, this child has to live a different way for a time. Instead of eating with a spoon, the child uses the umbilical cord. Sound familiar? Feeding tube. They say that the child has no “feelings”. Yes, they do. Push on the mother’s tummy gently, and the baby is going to get agitated and hit you back or move. They might not understand what they are feeling, but we all develop more every day. I am not the same person that I was yesterday.

So the common argument I hear is it is the woman’s right. I thought of an analogy. Let’s say you took your child to a babysitter and when you came to pick your child up, the babysitter tells you that she decided to “take care of it” because it was poor timing. If I was the mother, I would probably become outraged beyond words. It is the same concept. We are just God’s instruments to raise His children.  It is never about us, it never was supposed to be.

I am not here to condemn a woman who has had an abortion. She may have thought it was the right thing to do. Sin is sin. I am guilty of it every day! However, there is hope. The hope is Jesus. He is our salvation. The Bible says:

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.  John 3:16      

       

I am blessed by this family, and I rejoice because of the hope and love that we have in Jesus! 

Attending the NCIL Conference

            Attending the National Council on Independent Living (NCIL) conference was a life changing experience. I was excited to attend the conference because I have a desire to work in the independent living field one day and I love the DC area. When I arrived at the conference, I was a little overwhelmed with all the people who were there. For those who know me, know that is strange because I am usually very social. Shortly after, I met some awesome people from another CIL and was excited to see that the IL movement is bigger than our local center. One of my favorite speakers of the week was Senator Duckworth. I was so excited to see someone who is in the Senate being a great advocate for people with disabilities. Her story of perseverance and the need to educate her colleagues on disability issues is refreshing. It goes to show that we have more work cut out for us.  If you ever have the opportunity to listen to her story, DO IT!

         Another life changing event was the march to the capital and the rally. It was awesome to be a part of something that will go down in history. Hearing the people chant and carry their different signs shows that there is so much that needs to be changed in society for people with disabilities. I loved hearing the people that were passing by in their cars honking in support of us. Attending the rally was amazing because I heard some of the legislatures support what we were advocating for. I believe many people think everything has to be a fight with the government and to see some of them support us was awesome. Some of the senators told us that there are other people in the government that do not support our independence. I think that this was the point when I realized that what we were doing was important.

               
            The other great opportunity was the time that we had to spend with Randy Forbes’ legislative aide. One of the things that was very refreshing is that he actually took the time and listened to our concerns. He was very engaging and asked questions when he did not understand what we were talking about. One of the main points that we talked about was the lack of transportation for the community of people with disabilities. We could see that he really wanted to understand what we were talking and said that he took for granted his own transportation.

        Mostly, I am grateful for was the opportunity to get to know the staff and the other participants that went with us. The three of us had the opportunity to get really close and share some life stories that encouraged us. Some of the conversations that we had dealt with some issues that I have been facing in my personal life and I thought I was the only one that ever faced those issues. I think community is great and it is a necessity for independent living.
     

 

Butterfly Effect

So I have been really busy with summer school!  I have a paper due almost every week, so I have not written a post!  I know, excuses, excuses, EXCUSES!

Well, I can say tonight I have something to share!  David and I went to New Life and the woman who shared was amazing.  She talked about the butterfly effect.  I don't know all of the details!  (there's a book ) In short: the air from a butterfly wing can start a hurricane. Something so tiny can produce something so big!  That is like when God called Ananias, a simple disciple, to minister to Saul, who killed Christians!  But, Paul became the person that impacted the church in a mighty way!

Sometimes the thought comes to my mind: How can God use little old me, "a simple disciple", to impact the world?  After all, I live in Chesapeake, Virginia.  Oh Yeah, and I am in a wheelchair!  I could continue with the list of why I don't think God can use me to do big things.  But I have to choose to push those to the side, because the truth is HE ALREADY IS!

I have a heart to minster to people with disabilities and their families!  Many times I don't have the opportunity to share the Gospel.  I just share my joy. I really don't believe being in a wheelchair brings me joy!  It is tough, to be honest, it stinks!  But I know it is temporary!  So I am choosing to say yes to God and surrendering my life to Him.

Spreading my wings to fly to impact history!!!!!!!!!!

Partners

Today was a very special day!  Graduation day from Partners in Policymaking!! Yaaaa! 

You know when I first was accepted to the class, people told me it was going to be life changing.  To be honest, I really didn’t believe them.  I thought I was just going to hear the same things I knew about being a self-advocate.  I have been advocating for people with disabilities for years.  I am pursuing a Master’s in rehab counseling.  Come on, I better know this stuff. 

Man, I was wrong!!!!!!!!

We had pretty amazing speakers that came and taught us about different disability issues.  I laughed, cried, got angry, and celebrated.  I learned that knowledge is power.  I learned that knowing history is key to impacting the future.  I could go on and on about the things I learned….

But I think I have to say that I think that relationships within the group are what changed my life!  I met some of a most amazing people in Virginia.  Some of my friends have disabilities like me!  We talked about our hardships and how we could overcome them.  We cheered each other as we accomplished our goals.  We giggled over dinners and relaxed in the lounge. 

Then, there were the parents of children with disabilities.  All I can say is WOW!  I have never met so many dedicated, accepting, and loving people in all my life.  These mothers and fathers are living relentlessly to give their child with a disability the opportunity to live life to the fullest.  There is one father with a disability that changed my life.  I never told him but I have some fears about becoming a mother and being in a wheelchair.  He explained to me that there are times when he struggles to care for his children but there is nothing that can stop him from loving them. 

Lastly, there is Joe!  Joe may be the cutest almost five year old boy I have ever met!  I met him just before I was about to leave.  Let me tell you, an hour later, I still didn’t want to leave.  We made faces,  we danced, and he even followed me across the room.  He stole my heart in .2 seconds.  His smile filled my heart!  I pray that every person that encounters Joe will catch his joy like I did! 

In the end, the reason I want to be an advocate for people with disabilities is that I believe we all have gifts to share! 

Congratulations PiP Class of 2013!